Random Thoughts from the Road

It's not a good thing when you come back to a hotel after six months away and the valet still remembers your name. But you learn some interesting things on the road. Some are even useful. I thought I'd share a few.

aLoft
My loyalty to the Starwood chain is rivaled only by Terry Francona's loyalty to Jason Varitek. Starwood's new mini-W is not a bad place to stay, but the lobby plays non-stop techno like it's a Martini Lounge in downtown Denver with a $2 martini happy hour. And it smells like your dorm room that was hastily cleaned before your parents arrived for a weekend visit. In other words, you strolled in 20 minutes before their arrival and tried to cover up the smell of weed by dumping imitation Pine Sol all over the floor and burning 15 sticks of incense.

The Other Benefit of Being Well-Read 
When jumping on a plane, always take a hardcover or large paperback book. Not necissarily to read, but the next time you find yourself next to someone weighing 3 bills and they "spill" over the armrest you'll need that book to wedge inbetween you and your arm rest. And if you're thinking that this doesn't solve the upper body spillover, I've yet to encounter someone who didn't lean the other way after feeling that book push them back across the Mason-Dixon line.

Ever Wonder What Dubya's Been up to?
If you ever find yourself in Dallas tune into the local AM sports talk radio station. In the post-work drive time slot they have a host that sounds exactly like George W. Bush. At first I was jarred when hearing a dead-ringer of our best 21st century two-term President offer half baked thoughts on the Cowboys... but it feels like a natural fit after about 5 minutes. Jimmy Carter builds houses, Bill Clinton gives speeches, George W Bush talks football. Yup, everything is right in the world.

The Legend of Frank Dux
If you have a 3+ night stay in a hotel I guarantee you'll catch Bloodsport on Versus at least once if you turn on your TV after 10:00 pm. And in 15 years someone will be writing the same thing about The Transporter.

The "Entertainment" of In-Flight Entertainment is Used Loosely
The best movies I've seen on a flight: Transformers, In Burges, Bottle Shock and Ratatouille. I consider two of those movies watchable. But the selection of movies does move you to ponder the larger philosophical question of how Ryan Reynolds continues to find work. Personally I thought he would have peaked with Blade III.
And remember that Valentine's Day episode of The Office? And the Phyllis/Bob Vance of Vance Refridgeration restaraunt scene? Well, on the plane they felt this scene pushed the envelope a bit too far and it's cut out completely because it's OK to let robots blow up downtown LA but subtly indicating that a married couple decides to take a quick break during their lunch break is strictly off limits. In short, make sure you load up the podcasts before you depart.


And You Would Be?
Apparently this guy is a big deal. And apparently I'm getting old... because I talked with this guy for an hour before I had to ask him who he was after the third person asked me to take their picture with him. Conversely, when a handful of the 2008 Boston Red Sox bellied up to the bar at the Pasadena Westin before an exhibition series with the Dodgers it took me about 5 seconds to figure out who they were. Douchey.

Quick Hits
International red carpet lounges = free drinks. Domestic red carpet lounges = pay for drinks. Important distinction.

When they ask you to turn off all electonic devices shut it down. If you're so friggin' important why in the hell are you flying coach?

St. Ives is very different from St. Ides. Not really a travel learning but the St. Ives commercial just aired and my mouth started to water because I didn't make the distinction at first. On a related note (this commerical is also airing), I give the George Lopez show an over/under of 4 weeks. In other words, the promotion of the show during the playoffs will last longer than the show itself. See Frank TV for historical precedence.

Drinking out of those airline bottels is always a treat because it reminds me of the best dive bar on the East Coast. But it's even a bigger treat when you see someone in a suit double up on the Monday 6:00 am flight out and chase it with an Egg McMuffin.